Design Your Celebration
Create breathtaking drama, surprise, and lasting memories.
Coordination | Your Color Palette | The "Wow" Factor | Lasting Impressions | Surprise & Delight
"Like it or not, a wedding is theater," says David Beahm of David Beahm Designs. "Determine how much theater and drama you want — and choose your designer accordingly."
Check your designer’s background. Does he or she have experience in the theater? How well does he or she utilize light and other visual elements? Can your designer step back and see the whole picture?
"My theatrical background helps not only visually, but also logistically. I honestly don’t know how people do this job without theatrical experience. Lighting design, for example, will affect the color of my flowers. It can make them flat or make them pop. Lighting is an art, as is décor or music.
"I have a degree in drama and my godfather was a florist. So I just melded my interests together into a truly wonderful job," says David, who has worked in musical theater and grand opera in California and New York, as well as with some of the top New York event designers.
David also encourages you to ask for references from past clients. Was the designer easy to work with? "You want a person who can create drama for your wedding — but not drama in your life."
It’s About Coordination
"Remember, we’re talking about a party, and the last thing you need is more stress. Your designer has to be extremely well organized. It’s all about logistics and details."
Everything must land where it’s supposed to — when it’s supposed to. "Your designer can’t look at just one aspect of the party," says David. "The flowers, the lighting, the music and the food must work together. Everything has to be coordinated. If it’s not, it can be a disaster.
"On a micro level, for example, the florist has to manage the flowers so they’re at their exact peak when they arrive. The lighting person has to understand color and know how to coordinate with the venue.?
While experienced professionals can coordinate all these details, you must be assertive with the final word. ?The vendor doesn’t dictate," David says. "You dictate. The vendor has to meet your needs."
To help communicate this successfully, you must be organized and clear about what you want. Look through books and magazines to identify "things that push your buttons," as well as things you absolutely do not like.
"Your personality and the intensity of drama you desire must be reflected in your designs. That’s what determines the direction for your wedding."
Is it romantic? Is it festive? Do you want to set a trend? Do you want to be stylish and sleek? "These are all questions you have to answer before you pick a designer."
Your Color Palette
"Color sets the mood," says David, "and as the bride, you have to know your color palette. Don’t stop at the bridesmaid dresses," he adds, "because they are only a small portion of the event’s colors."
At the same time, don’t get overly focused on your colors. "I had a mother of the bride who was worried that the dresses wouldn’t match the carpet. No one is going to pay attention to that.
"That’s another key to finding the right designer — you want a person who can say, ‘This matters and this doesn’t matter.’ Otherwise, it can get to the point of being silly. A silly wedding isn’t where you want to be."
The "Wow" Factor
When it comes to the overall design of your wedding, David stresses the first impression. "When your guests first walk into a room, what is going to make them gasp? That’s the thing people will remember."
Is it the flowers? The lighting? The music? "It depends on the venue," David says. "If you’re walking into a grand hotel, you already have grandeur built into your event. Then you have to ask, ‘What extras can we add that will really take people’s breath away?’ "
The wedding of Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones was the most talked about one of the year. David was the designer. How did he envision the first impression?
"When you’re coming to an event at the Plaza, there’s a grand anticipation automatically built in." So he put the major emphasis on the terrace lobby, where people would be waiting to go into the ceremony.
"I knew we had a huge surprise, a huge gasp, waiting behind the ceremony doors. But we wanted to give the guests something to talk about even before they were inside.
"Once people passed security, they ascended a beautifully decorated staircase, turned the corner and saw a huge, 20-foot wide tree adorned with guest cards hanging from beautiful ribbons. It was a real conversation piece, an immediate ice-breaker."
Lasting Impressions...and Budgets
"You have to stand back and visualize where people will be concentrated, where they’ll be stopping and what will be their first and last impressions."
You must decide, "Are you going to make your lasting impression with the ceremony or are you going to wait until the reception?"
How do you make a lasting impression?
"The color and lighting are major influences," David continues. "Do you want people to look at the overall room or at intricate centerpieces on your tables? If the ceremony is in a beautiful church, do you go beyond that? Do you ornament just enough to let people know there’s a ceremony taking place, or do you take it totally over-the-top?"
Your budget is always a determining factor. "There’s nothing wrong with coming in with a budget and sticking to it, and I think brides have to understand that.
"You might have to make some unpopular choices to stick to your budget. But that’s okay. If you decide to exclude something, you’ll be the only person who knows it’s not there. The evening will not be ruined unless you let it be."
How can you stick to a budget and still make everything work?
"The height and breadth of the centerpiece is always a good way to add drama to the room. Candles do the same." (Make sure to check with your venue to see if you can have uncovered candles or if they have to be in glass.)
"Draping is another effective way to create lots of drama very quickly. And always, always lighting. It changes a room." For this, David encourages you to spend a little more money. "Anyone can light a room. But a lighting designer can change a room," he says.
"You may have to pay more money to the people you hire, but you can’t hire a florist with a bucket and a knife and you can’t hire a lighting guy who has three lights and some gel. If you want drama and theatricality, you’ll be disappointed."
Surprise, Shock, and Delight
For your wedding décor, David encourages you to "think out of the box." "True drama is created when you take risks," he says. "Don’t give people what they expect. Add surprises."
Use different textures. "Who says it always has to be flowers? For a Zen-type wedding, what’s wrong with rocks or water on the table? Try berries, bamboo and lots of candles."
Stacks of water glasses with colored water, if they are well lit, can be stunning centerpieces. "They’re a totally unexpected conversation piece."
Change the size of the tables. "Use square tables, rather than the typical round. Or eat banquet style, which is just lovely."
Hang things in the air. "For the Red Ball charity event at the Plaza, we surprised people with bigger-than-life helium balloons that were lit from inside, glowing over the room."
Be creative with what’s outside the window. "At one recent wedding we put round Chinese lanterns on bamboo poles all along the beach. It was a very lush, romantic setting and when you looked outside the tent, all you saw were gently bouncing lights. It wasn’t terribly expensive, yet it had a huge impact."
Surprise your guests with the space itself. "At this same wedding, as guests came in they walked through a long corridor into the reception tent. On their way in they passed a table laden with flowers."
Once everyone was in the reception, David and his staff opened up the rooms on either side of the corridor. The glass top came off the table to reveal a billiards table underneath. There was a lounge on one side and an entire room full of desserts on the other.
"So what seemed to be a staid entranceway became a very welcoming place to take a break from the reception music and dancing.
"Open up areas. Let your guests explore. Have them wonder what’s next. You can do the same with your music.
"Think about the music your guests will hear. Is it classical, rock and roll, big band, jazz? Each creates a specific mood. You can use them all in one evening. You just have to have a professional mix them properly.
"That’s why if you’re going to use a DJ, it’s so important to have a talented one. If you’re going to use a band, hire one that understands flow. You set the mood visually. What happens after that depends on your music and coordination."
Stage Managing Your Team: The All-Important Timeline
To create a seamlessly coordinated event, David works closely with all your professionals, from the caterers to the band. "Your creative team must work together. Everyone — catering, lighting, sound and décor — should be able to communicate well with one another.
"Creating this sort of team saves money, because areas often overlap. It also makes for a very cohesive evening that ‘flows.’
"You can even hire a stage manager in addition to a party coordinator, who will understand the technical aspects of your event and cue everything to keep the flow."
Involving professionals and creating a team takes the pressure off you. "You don’t have to worry if the lights are going to change when you want them to, or if that song is going to come on at the right time. The stage manager, wedding coordinator or designer has already planned that timeline, and sticks to it."
Keep in mind, too, that micro-managing your professionals might cause frustration. "I just had a friend of a bride say, ‘Oh my God! There’s not enough ivy, there’s not enough ivy!’ But you have to wait until the very last minute to put ivy into your décor, otherwise it will die.
"As professionals, we knew that, but because she didn’t, she made a big fuss — which ended up just wasting time and causing undue stress for everyone. You have to specify what you want, but then trust the professionals to do their jobs."
It’s a Celebration!
In the midst of all the preparation and details, don’t forget to have the time of your life. For David, putting all the pieces together is the fun part. That leaves you free to simply enjoy your day.
"This is indeed one of the most important days of your life, but it’s still a party. And if you’re not having a good time, your guests certainly won’t have a good time.
"That’s really the most important thing. You must have a wonderful time. And if that means cutting a few things on the budget, so you can have staff to handle things, so be it."
