"Everybody is involved and concerned," observes Scott Woldman, manager for private catering at the Waldorf=Astoria, "because this is one of the major purchases in life. You buy a car, you buy a house, you have a bar mitzvah or a confirmation. There may be a summer home or a boat. But a wedding is still one of the top 10 purchases in your life."

"People get engaged and right away think of one particular venue, or of a script they have to follow because it has endured in their family for so long. But this is the 21st century. The world is opening! Make it your wedding."

The Starlight Room, press photo

Fast-Track? Or Traditional?
Reflecting the different levels of support he provides, Scott may present you with any one of several business cards, each noting his title: "Unflappable Orchestrator of Your Big Day," "Emotional Supporter of Gushing Brides-To-Be," "Protector of Bridal Personal Space."

Offbeat? Untraditional? Sure. But each whimsical title reflects his confident, playful approach to your wedding, and his determination to make the entire process and the day itself full of meaning and fun.

"I try to find out how you and your fiancé met, what your favorite movie is, where you like to dine, your hot travel destinations and what clubs you frequent.

"Are you entrepreneurial in spirit? Do you have your own company. OLr is this a fast-track wedding, where you're saying, ‘Let’s get it booked, then let’s turn the page because our lives are very full already.’

"It’s of course a milestone event for the bride and groom, but is it also an anniversary for the grandparents, or a birthday for the brother? Are we going to miss a loved one that we will memorialize at the wedding in some fashion?"

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E-Mail Weddings
Traditions have changed so much that Scott now has a variety of international "e-mail weddings," where the couple makes a trans-Pacific or trans-Atlantic migration to the Waldorf=Astoria. "They bring 20 or 30 people for an intimate wedding here in New York because it is cosmopolitan, and they can plan it all through e-mail."

	At left: The Conrad Suite; above: The Empire Room. Fred Marcus Photography

They’’ll have a small civil ceremony in the Conrad Suite and then dinner in the salon. "It’s a gorgeous intimate gathering of friends and family, and it's going to be special because it’s happening 3,000 miles away from home."

Your Own Personal Style
Scott dedicates a lot of his time to ensuring that the bride and groom’s experiences are "whole." "By that I mean the nuances of who you are as a couple have to make their way into your wedding."

Scott encourages all his brides to send him their invitations, and this couple from Germany had created their own monogram. "To surprise them we stamped their monogram into chocolate medallions, and when the dessert comes out they will have their monogram on it.

"I am blessed with the opportunity to serve a very economically viable community," says Scott. "They are passionate about their careers and have strong desires to create unique events."

Once he gets to know the bridal couple, Scott explains, "I put on my thinking cap and ask, ‘How can we tell their community, whom they are inviting to the wedding, that these touches are a reflection of them?’ "

This is the first time you are introducing yourselves as a couple, and Scott helps you do it through your invitation, music, menu, "and also through closely guarding your personal space. There are a lot of very strong personalities pushing and pulling you when you are planning a wedding, and I have tremendous respect for your right to be a couple."

While Scott lets everyone express his or her views, he takes special care to shape the wedding so that, above all else, it celebrates — and personifies — you, the bridal couple.

"We can work with personal party planners, any one of whom we share many close relationships with. We can just plan the menu, stand aside as the day unfolds and be there in a support capacity. Or we can be the point people who control everything, from invitations, menu cards, band, photographer, florist, and anything else you might need."

Once the details are handled, the wedding’s own particular magic is able to unfold naturally. "Each wedding is fully charged with personal moments that happen at the drop of a hat. You don’t plan for them.

"I will never forget that moment when the bride’s garter was thrown, and an 85 year-old grandfather plucked it out of the air with his cane," says Scott.

"At a wedding we had last year the decorator had magnificent candles everywhere, but they were dripping on the men’s jackets as they went to the wedding." Ever diligent, Scott and his staff arranged for an assistant manager to collect jackets, go into the office, take the wax off with an iron and deliver them back to the guests. "We cleaned 20 different men’s jackets, and the men felt good about it. We'll do whatever is necessary for the event to go smoothly."

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Wedding Day Planning: One Step At A Time
"As soon as the bride comes in and makes her approval known," says Scott, "we negotiate the contract."

Scott Woldman and a Waldorf bride	The Jade Room. Photo: Edward Jacoby

For planning purposes, Scott has a specific agenda of what has to happen. "I tell you exactly what you have to do month by month.

"About three months before, we all sit down and talk about the menu. You detail all the vendors you have enlisted."

Six to eight weeks before, there is a tasting. "We meet with the pastry and the banquet chefs, plan the menu in detail, taste various culinary items, and craft the final menu. I find out where you are in the process, and then I streamline and personalize a weekly schedule."

Everything is done prior to the week before your wedding. "The menu is complete, and even the last vegan/vegetarian meal for your cousin at table 12 is planned."

From 19 to 1000 Guests
A lot of people hesitate about coming to the Waldorf because they think it is going to be too large, too impersonal.

"But that’s the farthest thing from the truth," says Scott. "The way we coddle the bride and groom and bring them into the Waldorf family of professionals is very intimate and reassuring. By the time the event happens, it is a very personal, very warm atmosphere."

The hotel has several rooms for your wedding. "The Starlight Roof has been a great venue for dinner and dancing through the 30’s, 40’s and 50’s," says Scott. "There used to be a retractable ceiling open to the stars for dancing. With the advent of central air conditioning, it was closed off." They are now putting in an open air hatch to the ceiling, so they can conduct Orthodox Jewish weddings under the stars.

The Starlight Ballroom can accommodate up to 300 people with dancing. The Grand Ballroom is size appropriate from anywhere from 300 people to 1200 depending on whether or not you are using the tiers.

Close The Lobby
"The Hilton and Empire Rooms near the Park Avenue entrance to the hotel are remarkable spaces." They close the Park Avenue lobby and that becomes the cocktail reception area. "The Hilton Room is the venue for the ceremony and the dinner-dance is held in the Empire Room. That can seat 200-250 people comfortably.

"If I had to pick the signature place at the Waldorf=Astoria for a wedding, that is the place. It will never change. It will be wonderful and you will have the bragging rights to say ‘I closed the lobby of the Waldorf for my wedding.’ "

The Waldorf has smaller rooms as well. The Waldorf Towers, a hotel within the hotel, has suites that accommodate anywhere from 10 to 50 guests.

"The Basildon, Jade, and Astor are beautiful rooms with a lot of history, as are the recently renovated Conrad and Louis XVI suites." These rooms have separate kitchens, pantries, and service staff.

Momentous Occasions
"A lot of my clients become lifelong friends," says Scott. "I was just sent a picture from the grandfather of a new baby, born to a couple I married four years ago. He sent me a very touching card that said, ‘Scott, here is the reward for all your hard work.’

"So I sent the grandchild an invitation to come to high tea at the Waldorf as his entrée to New York society, and at the end of the note I wrote, ‘P.S. You can invite your parents to come along with you.’

"When the bride appears and she is walking down the aisle ... How can you describe that? You see it, you sense it. Yet there are so many of those moments throughout the course of the evening.

"There are only so many momentous occasions like this in your life. So the expectations people have are extremely high.

"The guest’s perception is reality," says Scott. "There is no other reality."

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